Weekly sweatdrops

Seniors Speak: You have to read it to believe it.

At the close of the school year I enjoy giving seniors a special final writing assignment. They are told to write out a memorial sketch that could be used at this point in time in a memorial service if they were to leave this world suddenly. This assignment usually coincides with the reading of “Death Be Not Proud” by John Gunther, a beautifully written memoir from the father of a genius who died at age 17 from brain cancer.

     This assignment is usually not graded, but examined for length and for whether it fulfills basic requirements. They are asked to include life summaries, accomplishments, personal descriptions of themselves, and messages for people. The results are both revealing and enormously entertaining to read. My rationale for this assignment is that leaving high school is a traumatic loss for many students, not too dissimilar to a death.

     Here is a portion of one memorial sketch submitted by a habitually trouble making male. Do I actually discern some smidgen of soul searching or conscience in this document? I’ll let the reader judge:

I have lived a great life, especially in my English class at Huntington Park high school. I think I was a little bit of a procrastinator in my classes. But I certainly had the potential if I would have just put some dedication into all my work. Also, I liked to talk in the classroom because I would rather have done that instead of doing my work. As a child, I was very curious about anything that I touched or anything that I saw.

I disliked many things including teachers and the way that they behaved during their class sessions. They always seem to have a grudge against me.[how shocking and surprising!]  I was constantly kicked out of my classes, and also got suspended. I never got arrested though.

Well, the one and only thing I want people to know about me is that I never took shit from anyone who thought they were superior to me. Many things are not known by my family because when I was with my family, I always tried not to let things slip out. Yes mom, I stole, I fought, I lied…. I've basically committed every sin possible that was not too serious. I never killed anyone so that was good. But my life has many highlights too. I was a loving person when I wanted to be. When I was around people I didn't know, I was different. I was actually nice. When I liked the way a girl looked, I tried to be as charming as possible.

One of the most memorable events in my life that I will never forget was when I got my first suspension. It made me actually look at something from the standpoint of the teacher. I threw a stink bomb into a teacher's classroom. It made me realize that I was a really bad kid, and that I have gotten away with too much throughout my life. When I was caught I felt regret. Since then I realized that there were consequences to someone's actions. This saved me from doing far more horrible things throughout my life because I had so many chances to do so many bad things. I held back on many of those things. [notice the word, “many”]

    I predict a career in politics for that little lamb. The maturation process is a steep climb in the community of Huntington  Park. but a few make it to the point where they can actually look down at their former selves and offer congratulations to their new personas, whether congratulations is merited or not. Here are some words from a future auto mechanic:

I am into muscle cars, and hot rods. I don’t like Hondas at all. I don’t like people that use guns to kill, but I am in favor of bats, chains. brass knuckles, bottles, and switchblades to be used for violence.

     Through out my life I have been a trouble maker. I have been involved in plenty of fights. I was part of a gang. We used to fight against our enemies, and against dumb people that thought they were better than us. I have fought against punks, metal heads, skaters, wannabee gangsters, white boys, and dumb [n-word deleted]. After all this, I simply stopped because I began focusing more on me, and what I wanted to accomplish rather than who I wanted to beat up [smart move kid].

Now, I’m not like that anymore. There are times that people have tried to fight me, but I laugh at them and say a few words to them and walk away. They are the ones who end up looking like idiots.

I would like to be remembered as a bad ass drummer and guitar player. One thing I accomplished in my life was that I was able to perform at the House of Blues in Hollywood

 How about memories of school? What do the seniors remember of their lives in class? What learning took place? Here is another excerpt from another “graduating” senior:

I'm the person that all I thought about was having lots of fun. Maybe that's bad, and it got me into a lot of trouble, but that's just me. I try to satisfy my needs at all expenses. Yeah, I used to smoke the herb. I bet right now, you people who are reading this are like, “Oh, what a pothead. What a druggie.” - But it's not like that. That is just my choice of drug. Other people like to drink. I drink here and there on weekends. Lots of people smoke tobacco, but me, I don't even smell tobacco. That shit is nasty.

I will miss the fun and exciting adventures that me and my hommie's had all those times we ditched and got drunk and high, all those fine ass girls we handled, all those BJ's during school etc.[Yeah, keep dreaming kid.]

From a senior girl we can read of the value of academic pursuits: 

I want to thank all my friends from fifth period. You guys made 5^th period the best. Thanks for helping out with all the work. That's the reason why I think that I passed. [the wonders of cooperative copying displayed once again] 

Life never ends. It's just a trip that you will never come back from. I learned to be independent from my parents. I started working at McDonald's at the age of 16. I had a really great time.

During my life I had many goals that I wanted to accomplish. I had many great goals, some that I accomplished and some that I gave up on. One of my major goals was to graduate from high school and with my efforts I did. Another goal was to come out of high school without getting pregnant. I accomplished this goal, and proved everybody wrong about it. [And the gene pool of  Southern California  thanks you for it.]

If only an English composition class could be like a video game. But alas, it is not as this young senior male found out: 

Many of my friends tell me that I have an anger problem. I would let my anger take over me and do some things I would regret. But you can't always control your emotions. I controlled my anger, so I would not hurt my friends and family.

     Every weekend I had to do something. I couldn't stay at home all weekend. When I stayed home for the weekend it was some of the most boring days of my life. I love playing video games. When I stayed home video games were the only things that would save me from boredom. I used to have all the systems they came out with from Nintendo to PlayStation two. I could not stop until I would pass the game. If only I could have done the same thing at school [alas, if only].

     You could say that I learned from my mistakes. One thing that really changed the way I see things is school. School is a necessity to succeed in life. My English teacher, Mr. Keller, tried to point that out to students in all his classes [kiss, kiss].

     I would like to be remembered as someone that was trying to succeed in life, and that got my high school diploma. Also, I want to be remembered as someone who got one of the most beautiful girls at school to be mine. Everyone liked her, but no one could have her except me. Everyone tried to beat me up because they were jealous that I had her. I did not let that bother me.

One message that I would like to leave behind is for all the future squirrels in Mr. Keller's classes: “Study for your tests. Don't be like me who always failed his tests. Do all your work no matter how boring or uninteresting the work might be. If you don't do anything you will regret it. You're going to smell your diploma burning if you don't do your work. [Yes, doing nothing is like setting a match to that parchment paper]

A sense of priority emerges from these memorial sketches that reveals so much of what is important in the life of a high school student:

Now if I am dead, of course, I will have left some of my possessions behind that I cared for a lot. To be exact about these possessions, I cared for my shoes most of all. They were something that I treasured as if they were gold. I was a fan of Timberland boots,

Jordan and Nike shoes. I always tried not to get them dirty because it was a hassle to clean them. Now as many of you know, my clothes were something that always had to match with my shoes. And of course they always had to be clean too. If I am no longer with you guys and I am not in charge of my possessions, I hope they are given to those who were less fortunate than I was at the time I lived. [Put those Nikes on a pedestal and offer incense]

Impressing one’s parents seem to carry some weight of importance with a few students: 

     I want my family to know that I am actually into other things than what they might think. I am into all types of music to their surprise. I listen to jazz and all other types of music that isn't so cacophonous. I don’t like “DEATH METAL.” My vocabulary is actually extensive thanks to my English teacher, Mr. Keller (ha ha - any opportunity to get extra points.) [kiss up attempt was duly noted by Mr. Keller]

Kiss up attempts abound in a final writing assignment like this one: 

Oh yeah behave in school and learn something. Pay attention in school, especially to your English teacher, because he knows a lot, and he will also tell you not to behave like a squirrel. He will make you realize that getting your high school diploma is very important.
 

I tried to do the best that I could on everything that I set myself to do. I accomplished finishing my high school education, and I passed my English class. I think it was because I always heard Mr. Keller saying what would happen when students didn't pass their English class. [Somebody listened.] 

 What does an HP High School senior think an appropriate way to exit life might be?

  The spreading of ashes is supposed to be a touching and heartfelt event. It was designed so that the person could be let go in any place that he or she loved.

I have recently been talking with one of my closest friends about the whole ashes being spread thing. He was like, “My favorite place is Disneyland. So what happens if I want my ashes thrown there?” I broke out in laughter, because I immediately thought of someone throwing all of his ashes on the park and all the kids choking on the ashes and crying because their faces were full of the remains of the deceased. Their faces would be drenched in black ash and their Mickey Mouse lollipops would be soaked in it. So after thinking about that, I decided that that is what I would want people to do. I would want all of my friends to cremate me and throw me on the happy kids at
Disneyland, no matter what the consequence might be. After that everyone could get wasted on my account “Free rounds for everyone!” I always wanted to say that.

 

 

 

 

"The Nastiest Things" - A movie review drowning in personal issues

 It’s curious the way that personal “issues” or perhaps obsessions can plunge an essay attempt into a tangential sidebar that eats up the entire composition. For instance, I offer the following attempt at a movie review. Not only was it late, but the author obviously had something on his mind besides a critical examination of the movie in question.

Many juveniles go to prison for crimes that they do. In the movie American Me, we see a little of how prison is like. We also see why you should not go there or else try your best not to do something that will get you locked up in the penitentiary.

[a few paragraphs followed which rambled about the Mexican Mafia, and ratting out fellow prisoners, and following gang orders. - nothing that would indicate that he actually saw the entire movie. Then he seems to get stuck in one train of thought like a needle on a scratched vinyl record]

Many guys think that they are tough on the streets, but they get punked in the pen. In the pen it is a different world of dirty men. Gangsters run the world in the pen. 

Many men also get raped in there. This is something that no man who is straight wants to go through. Usually the guys that get raped are guys who were raped or molested as a child. Or maybe they are just easy prey for a psycho guy who wants it anal and rough. 

I personally know a guy who likes it rough and anal and would not mind going to the pen. Real nasty things go up in there. Stuff you would not believe goes up in there. The nastiest things go up in there. Like guys doing it with other guys, real nasty.

Someone once told me that I am too cute to go to the penitentiary. I wonder what would happen to me if I got locked up. I hope and wish that I never go to the penitentiary.

[I wonder what other movies this guy rents in his free time.]